My fears for the Zombie Apocolypse...

So I have just met up with some mates in town to go to cinema to see the new film World War Z. This is a film I would often avoid with a barge pole, but today I was in a fairly easy-going mood and decided, what the hell, I will confront my fears of anything which is more than a punch in the face, head on up to the lovely town of Burton-upon-Trent and see what all the hype was about.

Well, I have to say, I have not been that scared since I went to the cinema to watch Harry Potter: Goblet of Fire as an evening viewing, went home to bed and then had the worst nightmares ever. I have never known a film feel more like I am on a roller coaster. I am terrified of roller coasters.

I sat in the cinema with my hands clenched to the seat, and my eyes half open. I have come to realise as well it isn't the actually action that scares me, makes me nervous whatever, it is the tension leading up to it that I absolutely hate. I know it is coming, yet I still feel the fear. It is so common a technique for film directors to use, to create long moments, often a couple of minutes of minutes of suspense, before the action happens. And that is what I dislike about all this zombie films and alien invasion films.

I am a massive fan of War Of The Worlds, mainly for the music, I will grant you, but I love in War Of The Worlds how the music adds to the drama, which is what a film should do. Look at any great, Star Wars, Lord Of The Rings, High School Musical (joking) and you can all sing the theme tunes to those films. But in modern film making there is less attention to the music. It is all based on the action, and the way things fly at you, as you constantly duck and dive and weave through a sea of raining dead bodies, rubble and blood to avoid being killed in the process of watching the film.

And I know people rave about these films, but really they do nothing for me apart from make me really need a couple of Ibuprofen for a migraine and a massive great BigMac. Sorry guys, I know it's gay, but I don't like Zombie Apocalypse films. End of.

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